Isn’t complete without a little someone in my life. It’s something I’m not going to dwell on , but yep it hurts not seeing my distant Grandson growing up. There’s a big ball of love for him now and as life unfolds for him and as he grows older . I’m fairly wiped out with this subject of Grandchild alienation and my experience in the family court nearly a year ago was simply quite shockingly horrible.
I hold my hand up I was as nervous and I just hate public speaking, so saying my oath was a voice shaking experience. I didn’t come over as being confident in this situation. But nevertheless I’m pretty confident in other areas of my life. 🌟 So it’s not all bad, haha. 😁
Talking of confidence was one of my last conversations with my counsellor a good week ago or so. I have already started to put together a little something which consists of a post similar to this, it is nestled away in my drafts.
I can tell you as I recall my conversation with Gillian my counsellor , that I had the most beautiful words expressed to me by one of my friends from the line dance world. HAVE MORE FAITH IN YOU ! , my friend said to me. This just blew me away and so it’s still resonates with me now.
Those golden words of someone else’s wisdom and her own faith within her self. This just amazes me how these beautiful words shone so brightly over me and still does. My love for the some of friends warms me through and speaking as man or just a person as I see myself makes me feel a step nearer contentment.
Moving on , these last two weeks at work have been incredibly tough on my body and mind. ( The mind bit I’ll get too😁).
I sometimes wonder whether I actually need to have the aid of a personal trainer 🤣. Having someone like him is good for myself as I sometimes need that little extra motivation to exercise for my body as well as my mind.
Yep it’s been tough pruning all sorts hedges, individual shrubs that have just grown rampantly lately. So for my body it’s balancing on stepladders , stretching, sweating 😅 up and down the steps looking to see if the hedge is level or not.. , the past two weeks has been exhausting. So I’m resting today, even though it’s Grandson weekend! . Hopefully it’ll be going out day tomorrow 🥰🌟.
Apparently I’ve a little ailment called “ golfers elbow “ . Hmm, it aches with use of work and hoeing is so painful. The jabbing movement towards the soil is not helpful to any healing .. one needs to keep going.. I’ve had some challenges this last couple of weeks too with finding out my oldest van needs some welding or the other alternative is to get another van . So there’s a few stress’s there. Hmm what does a man do haha😂. ..
It’s now Sunny Sunday and I’ve had a lovely conversation with my little Alfie whilst I put together his breakfast. He really is a sweetheart. I gave him 3 wheatabix as these days they are mighty thin. I remember them being way more solid than they are these days. Grandma has just had a touching chat to Alfie too. As he asked Grandma , when he manages to eat 100 wheatabix, will You ( Grandma) be still alive? . , because I don’t want to live without you Grandma! . This is just heartbreaking 🥰💔. How does one move on from that…
Just this morning, a short while ago I just thought I’d listen to some goodness from Jay Shetty. I had a choice of a few different podcasters but I went for one of my main sources of inspiration in Jay. (Though I do love Fearne Cotton! . )
I’ve not listened to the whole conversation but what I did , has triggered me to write about something and everything. Yes I think I’m going back to my conversation with my life guide, Gillian and I thought I didn’t have much to chat about in our session.
But in fact it all came out the more I talked , this is sometimes in my last ten minutes or so. So then I have to squeeze all my goodness out of me and out there..
So is this me hiding things under layers of life or does life just get in the way or is MY LIFE MORE POSITIVE THESE DAYS that I don’t have time to be overthinking the negative stuff.
No , negativity is still there and I think life might just be a tad boring without it🤣. It certainly keeps me exploring who I am and where I can do better. I’m currently exploring different things and having chats with different individuals, my friends I don’t normally chat too to try and grasp something different or get a sense of a life where I think I’m struggling at the minute. So one or two business chats coming up. One of my usual friends says I just need to have more faith in me. Hmm.. that’s the second time someone has said this in recent weeks. One only gets this from stepping out into the unknown, breaking through the fear barrier or like my lovely friend wrote,
FEEL THE FEAR AND DO IT ANYWAY! .
Here’s to a great week ahead! Strive forward with your love and light , taking care of your self love.
Shine bright.. x
Ps.. if I’m reaching someone out there in the big vastness, this huge world and life.. Please share your experiences and loves with whom you trust , and of course you can also contact me here.. any messages can be kept private if you so wish.. 😁🌟.
edited etc.. 🌿
